why it's ok i have five-ish dollars in my checking account

so the best part about this article (besides the author's thinly veiled disdain for her subjects) is the great payoff you get when you google them and see that this is their actual website

misfortune, woe

Holy God, updating my blog.

Things that have happened to me lately:

1) got a new job where I get paid partially in bread

2) dragged myself through finals

3) lost most of my love for nicki minaj; transferred it onto remy ma (specifically, the single "conceited" which I had somehow never heard of but is basically the cooler lady version of right said fred's "i'm too sexy")

my mind right now:



(actually it's mostly captivity narratives and post-soviet politics, but whatever)

ALSO, this happened



So, I have this stupid painting of St. Lucy holding her eyeballs on my mantle. It looks kind of like this except not drawn with a laptop touchpad. Anyway, it's HUGE and on a gigantic piece of plywood like material. Since it is on the mantle it is surrounded/covered by random crap and knick-knacks: wooden owl, fertility figure salt shakers, big glass candles, Diana's employee of the month plaque, weird Talking Heads booklet that James Damon left when he went to Japan, etc. Kind of a mess, but has been completely unremarkable otherwise for months UNTIL



I was just minding my own business killing myself for some stupid paper when out of the blue the whole thing FELL ON ME...which also meant everything else crashed down, including lots of things made out of glass, so there was lots of horrible shattering and now you can't walk through our living room without shoes because there are still little pieces of glass everywhere

this is my life
welcome back to hearing about it

SHOOT THEM IN THE HEAD! FOR GOD'S SAKE, SHOOT THEM IN THE HEAD!!

So, not going to be able to get to sleep tonight (or possibly ever again, not that this would be a gigantic shift from my general insomnia). Made the horrific mistake of going to see The Crazies without having any idea what it was about, or pausing to remember my incredibly weak stomach. This movie scared the ever-living crap out of me. I thought I was going to pee my pants. Or puke. I couldn't eat my jumbo-sized popcorn because I was too busy clutching it to my chest like some sort of safety stuffed animal. Then a zombie townsperson jumped out of a dark corner in a particularly jarring manner, and I clutched it so hard that it exploded, sending popcorn everywhere, including at least two cups down my bra. Jesus.


TOTALLY HORRIFYING...


TOTALLY HUMILIATING...

I haven't really been able to get out of my jumpy mood since, and it's been a few hours. Stopping by CVS on the way home was like slow torture. Why I thought this night was a good idea, I don't know. Trying to turn my nervous energy into concrete plans for learning how to throw knives, shoot a gun, and drive stick. Got to increase my apocalypse survival skills somehow.



(On the bright side, Sheriff David Dutton certainly knew how to wear his pants. Dear God, if you exist, please let this be the only Crazies image to slip into my dreams tonight)

Man, I know I'm like five billion years late on this, but I can't believe how horrible that one Helen Keller song is. I actually listened to the lyrics the other day when it came on at work and was completely floored by how flat-out vicious they were towards the central (female) character. I mean, a general air of misogyny in music is obviously not new or remarkable, but this felt weirdly personal and low, like they were actually trying to hurt a specific person very badly. "Going there," I guess. Kind of surprised it somehow managed to balloon into a megahit anyway.

It's spring break now, which feels really weird/like a bit of a wakeup call or warning. Time to rev up my productivity engines. I've been playing around with hagiography/catholic iconography a lot this semester, and I like some of the directions that's been taking me in sketches, but I'm not super pleased with any of my completed work at the moment. It's been a really long time since I've focused on producing cohesive pieces, and I think it shows -- I feel like I'm missing some sort of connective element in almost everything I do. But whatever. That should come. On the bright side I think all of my pin-up exercises are starting to pay off a bit, I can feel myself developing a more fluid bodily line. Will post pictures soon!

Is it terrible that I think young Joseph Stalin was pretty attractive?


I mean, dang.